So. I'm absolutely freaking out. Really. This is worse than having someone come clean my house, for heaven's sake!
I mean there's no way in hell I can make the garden look better in less than 24 hours. Inside I'd have a fair chance of scooping up the clutter and dust bunnies if I was told (it will never happen) that some Good Fairy was going to appear in Tutu and Wings to tidy up and spit and polish everything that needs, well, spitting and polishing in my abode. But the garden? Ain't gonna happen. Especially when it's been in the 90's. For days. As in Forever. (At least!)
I soooo wish Mind Melding would become a reality soon. Or a variant of same that I think would work. I like to call it: Shared Magical Visualization. It would allow someone to see the perfection that YOU see whenever you look at what, in reality, are Pockets of Dischord*. How useful would that be??? Pretty darn useful I'd say! (PhotoShop is as close as I've come to what I have in mind for SMV, but, let's agree, it's cumbersome and time consuming. I'm thinking immediate results with SMV. No computer or WiFi needed.)
Alas. There's no way in hell (yes, I said "that" word again!) the kinks in SMV are gonna be unkinked in time for me to use it at the appointment.
But maybe, just maybe, I'll luck out and he'll have a really, really, REALLY good imagination. And maybe, just maybe, he'll be independently wealthy so that, instead of charging me an arm and a leg, he'd want to pay me for the sheer joy of transforming my garden into a beautifully hardscaped Paradise.
A girl can dream, can't she?
*Pockets of Dischord: what my friend Barbara's mom called the untidy places in her home. I have lots of them!